His/her questions were a bit strange, but you'll never believe what they uncovered about me. Read on to find out!
How far away is the person you miss? I usually have pretty good aim within 15 metres.
If you were to die today would your life be complete? No way. It would totally keep on going. I have put many safeguards in place to ensure my zombification.
Were you happy when you woke up today? I’m not sure. I only assess my happiness level when someone is leading me in a round of “If you’re happy and you know it”, because then I really have to think about it.
Has anyone told you that they would always be there for you? No. People usually say “I promise I’ll be there for you at least 65% of the time,” (which is pretty good actually, if you think about it).
Do you remember who you liked in 5th grade? Winnie Cooper.
Are you a fast typer? N… o.
What are you currently hearing? My kids strangling each other. Don’t worry, I’m sure they’re fine.
What's on your bed right now? Drool stains. I mean... clean sheets.
Is there someone who you can spend every minute with and be happy? Jesus. The Kool-Aid Man. And Luke Skywalker. He’s dreamy.
Have you ever been given roses? No! Isn’t that ridiculous? The botanical gift traditions in this country are so one-sided.
Who is your last text from and what does it say? I think my last text was from Houghtin Mifflin, and it discusses various Argument and Debate terms and strategies.
Latest you stayed up in the past week? Tuesday.
Are you currently wanting any piercings or tattoos? Just lightning bolts somewhere I don’t want to talk about.
Do you know anyone who is pregnant right now? I hope not.
Have you ever kissed anyone whose name starts with a L? I don’t think so. I mean, there was that one time I got pretty drunk and made out with like 5 girls simultaneously, and I never bothered to ask any of them their names. Oh wait… I don’t drink.
What were you doing at 8 am this morning? Sleeping! Woot woot!
If someone liked you would you want them to tell you? No, I’d want them to pass me a note with two little check boxes for yes or no. Then I would add a third check box for “I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit”
Are you too forgiving? People never do anything to me for which they would need to be forgiven. Because if they did I’d punch them in the back of the head.
Can you cook? I’m so hot you could fry up some bacon on my chest.
Have you ever not been able to get someone off of your mind? Not since Wonder Years got canceled.
Would you go in public looking like you do right now? No, I’ve got bacon grease all over my chest still from lunch.
Were you single on your last birthday? I was the single most good looking person there, so in a way, yes.
Do you get cranky when you’re hungry? When you can fry bacon on your chest, you never go hungry.
How long have you known the last person you talked to on the phone? I have no idea. I don’t think I’ve used the phone yet today.
Are you afraid of clowns? I’ve never been to the circus, but weren’t there some pretty freaky one’s in Pee Wee’s Big Adventure?
Do you hate crying in front of the guy you like? I don’t cry, I’ve just been cutting onions. I’m making a lasagna.
Are you left out a lot? No, I have a key.
Are you in a good mood today? When you look in the mirror and you see me, you always are. You wouldn’t know I guess.
How many mirrors are in the room with you? 35. I like being happy. And I know it. I clap my hands quite often.
Is there anything around your neck? Just hair. Sexy man hair.
Whats the last thing you burned yourself on? My George Foreman Grill chest. Don’t worry, I wrapped it in bubble wrap after.
Do you cut yourself? Sometimes I look so sharp I can’t help it.
When was the last time you had butterflies? Never. You can eat those?
Do you have any plans for tomorrow? I need to buy more bacon, and maybe some butterflies.
Who are you currently texting? Your mom. Ohhhhh!
Have you ever kissed someone named Paul or Luke? Well, I’ve got a 8x10 of Luke Skywalker with all the color worn off of his lips, does that count?
Do you have a best friend? Just the internet.
Did you ever go to camp as a kid? Camps have too much dirt. It grinds my gears.
Do you look like your mom or your dad? I look like a crude version of my creator.
Do you own a camera phone? No, I just use my memory.
Who was the last person that told you they love you? I don’t know what love… nevermind. I’ve been trying to hint at it the last few questions, but that’s not going well. So I’m just gonna come out of the closet, and out myself as what I really am – a robot.
What do you wear to sleep? Robots don’t sleep.
Are you easy to get along with? Who doesn’t love fresh bacon?
What is your favorite time of day? 4:20 dawwwwg!
Would it be hard seeing someone else kiss the last person you kissed? Yeah, that scene where Leia kisses Luke is nasty.
Who was your last call from? One of my ro-bros.
What was the last thing that you put in your mouth? Cyanide.
When was the last time you were sick? About 30 seconds ago through the present.
Have you ever thought about getting your lip pierced? Well, one time I wa
Does a kiss make you feel better? Yeah, Mark Hamil just came over and totally saved me with his light saber lips. It was awesome.
Have you ever passed out on the bathroom floor? No, but I’ve got Mark drugged up in there right now so he can’t get away.
Do you start the water before you get in the shower or when you get in? I’m a little rusty on how the whole showering thing works. Ha! Get it! And people say robots can’t understand the nuances of word play.
Have you ever had stitches? Ugh. This is so un-PC. It totally neglects the significant portion of the population who do not have permeable skin, and thus refer to repairs as soldering, not stitches. And no, I haven’t. My body is flawless.
Can you use chopsticks? My fine motor skills are quite adequate for such silly tasks.
What is the last thing a girl gave you? A glass of water. That was the last thing because that is considered attempted roboslaughter, and she had to be destroyed.
Where is your phone right now? I carry it on me at all times. It’s like an appendix in my world. I could live without it, but I’d rather keep it.
Do you like the rain? No, kinda like the shower. I do like Rainn Wilson though.
Comments (4)
This made me smile.
Very interesting!
... does not compute.